Tuesday, January 27

Lars Andersen: Archer Extraordinaire

Remember When Myth Buster's Busted My Beloved Kevin Costner's Slick Split An Arrow Trick?

Enter Lars Andersen: Scholar, Bad Ass, Archer, Jumper, Expert.

Lars Andersen Began Letting Loose About Ten Years Ago. He Realized That Quivers Suck Big Time For Carrying Your Arrows Around When You're Oot And Aboot Romping Thru The Woods. He Also Noticed That Quivers Were Really Slowing Him Down And Was Like "THE FUCK???" So He Consulted Thee Book On Archery And Rediscovered The Olds Ways. G'Bye Quiver.

And That Was Not The End Of Lars Andersen's Historical Upgrades. Because Archers Of Yore Weren't Lighting Up Primary Colored Targets In The Yard The Didn't Have All The Time In The World To Get A Shot Off. Ancient Syrian Archers Were Expected To Be Able To Loose 3 Arrows In 1.5 Seconds
Chicka-Waaaaaaaaa
So Fast
My Boy Lars Andersen Lets Loose To The Tune Of 3 Arrows In .6 Seconds
AND THE CROWD GOES WILD
O M G
Back It Up And Watch It Again
O M G
He, And They, Were/Are Able To Shoot So Fast By Improving Their Efficiency. Lars Andersen Noticed That In Ancient Texts Archers Are Consistently Depicted Holding Additional Arrows In Their Shooting Hands,Effectively Turning Themselves Into Automatic Weapons. Bows And Arrows Become A Close Combat Game Changer When An Archer's Efficiency Of Movement Allows Even The Closest Target To Be Hit In The Blink Of An Eye, 3 Times.
Lars Anderson Also Noticed That Ancient Archers Shot From The Right Side Of The Bow. Again Efficiency Dictated That Arrows Were Shot From The Same Side Of The Body Where They Were Held, In Hand, At The Ready.

Lars Andersen Took The Historical Improvements And Practiced And Practiced And Mutha Fuckin' Practiced.
Practice.

LARS ANDERSEN HAD ANOTHER ARCHER SHOOT AN ARROW AT HIM AND LARS ANDERSEN SHOT THAT ARROW IN HALF WITH A BOW AND ARROW.


🐐

jv

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1 comment:

  1. he likes hawkeye in the avenger, I really like this video
    Inzanami

    ReplyDelete